Brian Warders' Blog: the Box

Introduction

hey, my name is Brian Warders, and i decided i would create this blog to document my findings from a box that i found on my porch a few days ago.

The Discovery

basically, me and my mom moved to Wyllowville a couple weeks ago, why? that i don't know, but hey it's whatever man. then one day i went on my porch to wait for my friend Jake, who wanted to come chill that day. that's when i found the box.
the box had this patchwork of blue and purple tape all over it, and on the paper that was taped to it, it read "FOR BRAIN WARDERS ONLY, IF NOT BRIAN WARDERS, DO NOT OPEN!!!" the box was also tied shut with a shoestring, i picked it up and it was pretty friggin heavy, from there (stupidly i know) i took it inside, and it's been sitting inside my closet for the past few weeks not doing anything.

Initial Thoughts and Theories

1. my first theory was maybe it was just some weird prank from Jake, i mean he likes to do things like this to me all the time so it wouldn't be out of the ordinary.
2. it was a stalker, and there's like some severed head in the box, although i don't really make anything in terms of online content so i don't see why anyone would stalk me, also it would have smelled.
3. it was a bomb.....well my room is still here so i don't think that's the case.

The Unboxing Process

1. untied the shoestring holding this thing closed, thing was kind of stitched in there so that was a pain in the ass.
2. opened it up, and saw a couple shopping bags, i assume these were used as some sort of "packaging" to keep anything inside from being damaged.
3. i removed the bags, and inside i saw a few...interesting things to say the least.

Contents of the Box

1. a Surface Tablet, it was a bit dusty but i tried turning it on and it actually worked! so that's cool, hey, free tablet am i right? there was even a charger for it